I recently had a friend of mine over and we got talking about life and relationships, one thing lead to another in the midst of our conversations it occurred to me that when it comes to relationship especially in our generations majority of the time it’s more or less a business transaction that basically thrives based on the profit you make.
Let me break it down this way;when a business man gets into a particular business venture just because he heard or realized he can make a lot of money from the business; he basically won’t care how things are done or ran as long as he gets his money at the end of the day then he is fine but the second that business stops yielding profit, he basically abandons it and look for the next profitable thing but if he be had started the business or company based on some kind of natural love and passion for the business, whether it thrives or not, it stops being about the profit(money) and he is going to give it all it takes to make that business grows regardless of how hard it would be.
I am going to assume you understand what I just said and I would jump right into it. MOST GUYS WANTS SEX AND MOST LADIES WANTS MONEY and most times that all they really need to start a “relationship” there is an instant attraction when money and sex come into play, in-fact the only reason the girl isn’t a prostitute is probably because of the girlfriend tag or title so to speak but the truth is the only reason she is cooking for him, sleeping with him, following him up and down like a dog and most like “tolerates” is because she knows when she needs money, he would always provide and the only reason the guy is
probably in the relationship is because the sex is great, getting constantly served any and everywhere in whatever he wants it plus she looks good so it’s a win win.
When you ask most people what they want in a partner, most of us have this very unrealistic list in our mind; beard gang, tall, six packs, rich, figure 8, dimples, big ass and so much more.
It stops being about what is on the inside and it’s purely physical. It’s basically saying “this is what I can give you, what am I getting in return”. When a relationship is based on just physical and material things it would crash the minute anything happens to what attracted you to that person in the first place. Don’t get me wrong physical appearance matters, if u asked me a few years back I would have told tell you I wanted someone with Boris Kodjoe face, Micheal Ealy’s eyes, Morris chestnut’s smile and just complete it with Lance Gross’s body, I know I was greedy but when all that goes, if he gets into an accident and he loses that beautiful face I love would I still want to be with him? Has I begin to mature physical appearance feels like a bonus to me now as long as he has a good heart.
That’s why most people break up and get divorced because they are dating an unrealistic idea of what they think love is. It’s sucks but the truth is beauty fades and if it doesn’t there would be people finer and sexier and more “endowed” than the person you are with right now, rich people get broke and there would always be someone richer than that person and you also get tired of having sex with the same person at some point, seriously.
So many people love because of what they stand to get, am not even sure if “love” is the right word for it but you should know this: don’t “love” because you are lonely and you merely need company, don’t even “love” because you need a wife but you should marry her because you love her. Don’t “love” because of the money, don’t “love” because she is pretty, don’t “love” because he is hot.
I feel like so many people don’t get the concept of Love; so I would put it this way. When you love someone it stops being about what they have it’s about who they are. You love without expecting anything in return, they make you want to be and do better. It’s not even about the person physically, it’s how they make you feel, how you smile when they are around or how you think about them, it’s almost like loving their soul.
I wish I could explain better but I hope you have an idea and if you are with your partner for selfish gains or reasons you need to re-evaluate your relationship.